Yesterday my husband woke me up with some disappointing news. Apparently our possessed dishwasher died or slipped into a coma.
Never being one to believe anything that Joe tells me regarding the health of an appliance, I quickly went to check on the patient myself.
I jiggled the door. I tried to rebalance it. I pushed every button I could.
No luck.
Not one light went on. No odd noises. Nothing.
Joe was right, it was dead.
Our family of five will be without a dishwasher until a repairman comes Tuesday.
I’m going to guess that most moms would be upset at the thought of being without their dishwasher for a few days.
But my first thought wasn’t all the dishes I would have to hand wash until the repairman comes and performs what will be the sixth exorcism on this crazy machine that has never worked properly from the day we bought it.
No, the first thing I thought of was, is this a sign? Are the fates trying to tell me something about my blog?
After all, I started blogging at the same time we purchased the dishwasher. It’s been my muse, even my alter ego.
To say that I’m a late bloomer in regard to technology would be a gross understatement.
Never in a million years would I have guessed that blogging would become such an important part of my life.
I didn’t even have an email address until 18 months ago, and I did that only because my kids’ schools went paperless. There I was in the fall of 2010, face-to-face with the modern world of the 1990s.
The idea that I’m now a full-fledged mom blogger writing my weekly essay, keeping up with my Facebook page and Tweeting is enough to make most people who know me crack up.
I know my Alexa ranking, my Google score, and the number of page views I get each day.
There have been times in the last year-and-a-half that my family has wondered who I am and what have I done with their mother?
What happens if my dishwasher gets fixed, or, heaven forbid, replaced?
I have to admit that my crazed appliance has become a bit of a security object, not unlike my youngest son’s stuffed bear Fuzzy.
Peter has had Fuzzy since he was nine-months old, and that bear has been through everything with him.
Now seven, Peter doesn’t need Fuzzy in the same way he once did. He even left him home the last time he slept over at my parents’ house.
But when the pressures of being in first grade really get to him, he still turns to Fuzzy.
I feel that way about the crazed appliance. Can I write without my dishwasher being possessed?
You may think it silly for a grown women to be so attached to a kitchen appliance, especially one that barely functions.
But the dishwasher came into our lives at the same time that I started this blog. I was very nervous about finally putting my thoughts out on the Internet and pressing publish.
I knew I had something to say and something to offer, but thinking it and actually doing it are two different things.
I was also at a crossroad.
Peter was starting kindergarten.
For the first time in 12 years I was going to have a stretch of time with no kids at home.
My identity had been very tied up in being a mom to small kids. It was a job I had wanted for as long as I could remember, and I was feeling very sad that this chapter was ending.
I loved walking babies in strollers, cuddling them in a rocking chair, and chasing toddlers around the supermarket. I was sad that this time was over.
Turning to writing and blogging has filled a void in my life.
In the last 18 months, I have found much joy in writing and sharing our family’s adventures. I love being the mom behind the crazy appliance.
I’m not the same person I was when I started posting my weekly blogs.
I’ll confess that the children are not always sure they like this new mom.
“Mom, you have become obsessed with that site,” my 13-year-old said to me after a recent family outing. “All you do is write and work on the blog.”
He was really upset. My kids were not used to sharing me with anyone, least of all a blog.
I felt for him. I have very clear memories of how I felt when my mother started to work and really loved it.
I explained that as much as I love being their mom, my blog brings me a lot of pleasure. We also went over the guidelines about what I could and could not share about them.
The truth is as much as I love my life as a mom, I really like my time as a writer.
At 46 I have found a path that I really enjoy.
And, I have a possessed dishwasher to thank for it.
Even if its demon is exorcised on Tuesday.
one mom's attempt to find humor in the chaos
Much thanks to Joseph Radigan, who besides being a great husband and father, also uses his talents to gently and ever so tactfully edit my blog. Joe is a business editor at Thomson Reuters in NY.
Something tells me you will be just fine with or without the dishwasher 😉
Thanks Melissa!! xo
I agree with the previous poster. I have been reading your blog from the beginning and even if the dishwasher is no longer possessed or it is ultimately replaced it served its purpose in putting you in a certain path. It doesnt define your blog… You do 🙂
Thanks so much Jenny! Thanks for the support, it means so much to me!
Amen to the first two comments. You are an amazing woman and writer. Keep on keeping on, girly! Besides, even if the dishwasher does finally get repaired, there’s no rule that says you can’t start a new blog with a new “mission” and simply transfer all your fans over with you!
Hugs and love to you dear friend!
Rosann
Thanks so much sweet friend! I think the dishwasher and I will continue even if it’s no longer possessed, in my heart it always will be!!! Lol! Thanks for the support, I so appreciate it!! Much love!!
i’m with all the women above! 🙂
you’re awesome and will continue to be an amazing writer and mama, even if the dishwasher has too many demons <3
i completely understand having a connection to something so strongly.
your dishwasher was an inspiration and friend to you.
steve makes comments too. he loves that i have my blog (as he has his video games) but he teases me now and then.
thank you, kathy. for all you share. for all your support. and love always <3
sending love to you and your dishwasher <3
i’ll be thinking of you!
xoxoxo
maria
Thanks so much Maria!! I didn’t think about the fact that the dishwasher has become a friend to me, it’s true, crazy, but true!!! Sending you so much love, thanks for the support!! xo
Kathy, with or without that dishwasher you write and we will follow. 😉
I enjoy your posts. I laugh. I smile. I feel your pain as a mom. So old dishwasher, new dishwasher, no dishwasher…. You are still you and you shall write so we have a place to visit and share your joy and pain.
Good luck with hand washing those dishes until IT is repaired. Or for a few days… Paper ware??? No very Eco friendly I know … Or do what we do when we vacation- dont get the dishes too dirty and you can use the same one all day!!!! Lol.
Hugs,
Steph
http://www.pendantsbysteph.blogspot.com
Steph thanks so much for the kind words!!! I think we might rely on paper for a bit, that and a mix of me washing dishes! Funny but you do get use to having a dishwasher! Thanks again for the visit, great to hear from you!! xo
So glad you found a passion just for you…and even more glad for the rest of us who get to benefit from it! Your dishwasher may have felt like a spring board, but it was you who had to take the jump. Hope it resurrects for you, and if not, hope your dishpan hands don’t slow down your writing! 😉
Thank you so much for the very kind words!! I hope my dishpan hands can survive too!!!
I am so glad you decided to pursue this passion of writing. Methinks you’ll be just find without the security of a possessed dishwasher in your clutches. ☺ Happy Monday, friend!
PS….My kids go back and forth about my blogging. Some days, it’s “Can you put this on your blog?” and other days, it’s, “Are you STILL writing?” ☺
Thank you Larri!!! I think I will be okay too, plus I may actually have clean dishes!!! Much love to you!! xo
I bet the new washer will come with tales of its own.
That is an excellent point! Thanks so much for dropping by!!!
Kathy, oh no! Paper plates till he comes!
I know how you feel aout being sad the stroller phase is over. I was looking at my boys this morning – they really aren’t babies anymore and it happened soooo quickly! Also my hubby thinks I’m addicted to blogging – sure feels so doing a post a day for this A to Z challenge!
Have a great day,
Leigh
http://www.oneandoneequalstwinfun.com
I must confess we did use paper plates today! Leigh I often kids around with my blogging friends that my husband is days away from sending me to blogging rehab!! xo
Well, I was going to tell you to go get a new one and do a happy dance. But since your blog is based on the funkiness of your dishwasher, maybe a used one woudl be better if the possessed one can’t be fixed.
I have had two dishwashers since moving in 8 years ago. The first one sounded like we were in the middle of a carwash and couldnt run it while we were watching TV. So I gave it away…and the new one, I have to open up to see if it’s running.
The sad thing is the silly dishwasher is only 18 months old! And, it was not an inexpensive model! But, thankfully we did buy the service contract, which I have to say I usually don’t do, so we are covered! Thanks so much!!
I love Service Contracts! We had our front loading washer replaced under one, in a years time b/c the parts were going to cost more than the washer. Had our fridge repaired twice and they have checked on our dishwasher too. I’ll check back to see what the problem was.
It seems like dishwashers always break down, we just had one replaced, it just stopped working, hubbie tried to fix, but it was unfixable. Its best to go refurbished then brand new, because hey its gonna break down again sometime 🙂 Love your blog Kathy.
Pamela its funny because the one that the possessed appliance replaced was not that old and was a very fancy brand, this one is only 18 months old!! But, it is under a service contract, so we are cool!! xo I love your blog too!!!
Is it weird that I’m also thankful for your posessed Dishwasher becuase it brought me you 🙂 I’m glad you’ve found something that lets you be you because you are too GREAT not to share with the world!
Katherine what a sweet thing to say!!! You made my day!! Thank you dear friend!! I needed this today!! xo
Maybe it just needs a bonbon break. Love you. Love the dishwasher. Without it, who would I have talked to on the phone for an hour and a half this morning? Thank you dishwasher, even if ya kick the bucket.
Val I don’t know about the dishwasher but I totally need a bonbon break!!! Love you too and I loved chatting for an hour and half!! xoxo
I think you should create a memorial to the possessed dishwasher and get a brand spanking new one. I think it would honor the old muse while allowing a glorious new muse to propel you ever upward 🙂
I LOVE this idea!!!!! I’m totally giving the possessed dishwasher a memorial service if it is it’s time to meet the great kitchen in the sky!!! Thanks for the GREAT idea! If it dies I will post pictures!! Great to see you here!! Sending much love!!
Oh Kathy, I can so relate to everything you said!! I just started blogging a couple of months ago and it has become such a big part of my life, a source of pride and joy!! I sometime wish I could do it full time but alas, it does not bring in an income, just an ego booster! I love your blog and I love finding other good blogs to read! Thanks Kathy, you are a great writer!
Take care,
Lisa
http://www.lisagradessweinstein.blogspot.com
Thanks Lisa! It’s funny how important the blog has become, it is really a great outlet! Thanks for your sweet comments and visits, I so appreciate them!! xo
You could always put it on your front porch and plant flowers inside! (Foretelling what’s gong to happen to all of us in the end…lol)
I love this idea too, maybe after the memorial service I could give it a place of prominence in my home!! A planter would be a great idea!! Thanks for the great laugh!! Love you!!
If you end up having to get a new dishwasher, you should put the possessed one on display on your front porch. You know, like they do in the hills of Arkansas?? It’s not tacky or anything and that way you’ll get to keep all the sentimental value around for even longer ;D
Nate your comment as well as Becky’s and the one about having a memorial service for the appliance have been my favorite and will make me laugh for a long time!!! I’m glad it’s not tacky to have it on my porch, I’ll be sure to let my neighbors know that my friend in Texas said it is cool!!! Thanks for the laugh my friend!
I like Nate’s’ comment above, giggle xo
Nate’s comment made me giggle too! You should check out his blog, he is hysterical! Katherine, do you think it would be tacky to keep it on my porch? Becky Jane thinks it would make a great planter!! LOl!! xo
Out in the boonies where I live it wouldn’t be strange to sit your dishwasher out on the porch – allowing its existance as muse to remain.
But something tells me you’ll be okay, even if it must disappear.
And, who knows, maybe the next one will be possessed too –
I thought of that too, the new one could be a possessed as this one is!! Who knows I could be world famous!! Lol!! Thanks so much for the visit and smile!
Maybe you could turn the old one into a gardening pot of some sort and “plant” it where you can look outside to see it each day when you blog? Repurposed! AND recycled. Fitting for April, I think! 🙂
Great idea Karen!!! I love these suggestions!!! Lol!! xoxo
oh wow… perfect timing for me to visit your blog! I SO relate… it has filled a void in my life as well; when I first started blogging I wasn’t exactly sure the direction it was going to take, knew nothing about facebook pages, twitter, forums, much less blogging. I just knew that I needed something for me… an outlet of sorts.
I am so looking forward to reading more of your blog!
Thanks so much for coming over and checking us out!!!
Aw! So sad! I was just halfway through reading, realized the title of your blog, and then…..PANIC, what’s she gonna do! Hope he’s fixable! Would hate to see you lose your muse. By the way, I think it’s perfectly normal for a woman to get so attached to a kitchen appliance! 🙂
Joy
http://www.PardonMyPoppet.com
I don’t think I’m going to have to worry. The possessed appliance has lived up to it’s name and when the repairman came on Tue worked just perfectly. I think it’s just meant to be that the dishwasher and I will be together for a long time!!
This is my first time to your blog, and now I am going to go back and read some of your other post! I can understand your attachment also… if my dishwasher broke I don’t know what I’d do… buy another one I imagine. My children are just about grown 20 and 22 and it is still hard for me to let go of them. I can still picture them with cool aid rings on their faces! I am glad I found your blog. Hope you get a new dishwasher soon and it is as much of a muse to you as the one that is broke.
Thanks so much for the visit and sweet comments! It goes so fast doesn’t it? I don’t want to even think about the time my own are in their twenties!!! Thanks again for coming by!!
Girl this is so funny. I had no idea you were such a techno-phobe. I’m so much the same. I came to the blogging world kicking and screaming and truly only did it because I believed God was asking me to. Praying your dishwasher situation gets resolved soon! XO
You did not know that I was a techno-phobe Shannon!! I must hide it soooo well!!!! Lol1!! Thank you so much for your prayers regarding the dishwasher!!! Love you!! xo
you dont need a possessed dishwasher to be amazing… You don’t need a muse… You rock! I am always amazed when you remind about how new you are to technology…. I always find it so hard to imagine!
Thanks so much Hilary!!! Yes, I’m very new to technology I can’t believe it didn’t show when I met you back in October at the blogging conference!!! I guess all those acting lessons paid off for something!!! lOl!! Love you!!
I agree with your other readers. Your possessed dishwasher did its job…spurred your creativity which ultimately led you to create an amazing blog. I am sure you’ll let us know if your possessed dishwasher is “repaired” or you get a “new” one. Either way, a dishwasher is a MUST in your busy life!
Thank you my dear friend!!! The possessed appliance lived up to it’s name and is still your very happy neighbor!! Much love to you!
Do not be defined by your dishwasher! LOL!! I think I am watching too much of Oprah’s Lifeclass.. LOL!!! Maybe you should be thinking of a nice place to display it if you ever would have replace it. A shrine of sorts! LOL!!
Carla I may have to get a t-shirt printed with the “I’m not defined by my dishwasher!” I love it!!! When and if “Damien” leaves me I will most certainly make a shrine to it!! Lol! xoxo
I agree with Carla. You are more than your dishwasher! Sometimes, you have to cut bait and go it alone, sink (pun intended) or swim! My guess is that you will swim. And fly. And keep doing the voodoo that you do. I loved your kids asking you what you did with their mother. I can honestly see you at your computer, in the zone, while the family swirls around you. Let us know what happened with the dishwasher regardless! XOXXO
The image of me at the computer with family swirling around me is very accurate!!! Thank you, I now know I’m more than my dishwasher!!! xox Love you!! xo
You are not defined by that Linda Blair dishwasher of yours. But I’m glad you started blogging because of it! I so enjoy coming to read your weekly posts and I lol’d when I saw your facebook update this morning.
It’s like the prizes really. I would dig through those boxes making a disaster everywhere but give me that same toy without that effort and eh, it didn’t seem so cool.
Happy Friday!
Thanks so much Susan!! I’m probably the only person on the planet who worries about an appliance working the right way!!! Lol!
Thanks for mentioning the FB status. I forgot about the whole toy thing, you are so right, sometimes the fun is in the looking. I also think there is something fun about driving mom crazy!!! Lol! Thanks for the great comment and support. It means so much to me!
Think of it this way….a repair might give it a new personality, and I’m sure that new personality will continue to inspire you! Or maybe the more significant message is that with or without the possessed dishwasher, you’d still be perfectly fine and continue being a good writer! Have a great weekend Kathy! Don’t worry about the dishes. Go disposable for now ;-))
Thanks so much Joy!!! You are so great!! It’s true a new personality might inspire me again! Lol! As it turns out the crazy appliance will continue on since when the repairman came it worked perfectly fine!!! I don’t think the dishwasher really liked all the suggestions of using it as a planter!!! Lol!! xoxo
Sorry for being tardy with my comment! WOW…I can really relate to your story about blogging! I’m at the same stage in life, and my blog has really filled a void. Of course, I wish it would make more money!!! Can’t wait to hear the diagnosis on your dishwasher!
Making money is the next step!!! Lol! Thanks so much for the visit! I love your site! Take care!
Yes, as moms we do need an outlet too but it is hard to find the balance. But I know at times when I have felt alone in something or like I was the only one and then I write about it only to find out there are so many moms that know what I am going through- it is wonderful
Emmy you are so right in how writing and blogging can really make you feel less alone. I also agree that so many times things I think that I’m the only one feeling turn out to be something that others have felt as well. The community in the blogging world is wonderful. Thanks so much for the visit. I so appreciate the support!
I love this post, Kathy! You make me laugh and cry at the same time.
Well, you can always find another possessed home appliance to serve as your blogging inspiration 🙂
At the end of the day, you’ll always be the talented writer you are: dishwasher or no dishwasher.
Thank you so much for your very kind words and your support of me! I so appreciate it!!! I have a feeling that possessed appliances will be in my life for a very long time!!! xo